Several years ago, when I was at a low point in my marriage, I met a young lady and immediately got a huge crush on her. She was very pretty, and we had a lot in common. I knew it couldn't go anywhere because I still wanted to stay married, and because I was clearly too old for her. Still, I spent about half an hour talking to her the first time we met, and then I exchanged some e-mails with her, and went considerably out to met her (briefly) a couple more times. (Nothing sinful happened.)
Since then, we have both moved to different states. She’s gotten married, and my own marriage has improved greatly. Still, I find that young lady very interesting, and I have been googling her name a couple time a year to find whatever I can about her. She is on Facebook, and I am thinking of “friending” her. However, I am afraid that I might seem kind of creepy, kind of like I’m stalking her.
So, what do you think? "Friend" her, or forget about her? I would especially like a female perspective.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
I think you'd be inviting trouble on the part of your marriage. What if your crush re-develops? This has major potential to disrupt your marriage.
Since you met the lady long ago, there's a possibilty she may not even remember you, and even if she does, she may be a little shocked or creeped out someone she met YEARS ago is friending her. If someone did that to me, I'd be a little weirded out, and wonder WHY, after all these years.
Not a good idea. You wanted her then, having her in your life is only going to rekindle that same feeling, as you've obviously been searching for her-- for whatever reasons you're telling yourself.
Don't be a married man looking for trouble with a young married woman.
It would be creepy and totally inappropriate.
And if you don't take my advice, then ask your wife what she thinks.
Go ahead, some people my buddy hasn't seen in 30 years ask to be his friend on facebook. Try it out, the worst that happens is she declines.