Is my daughter too young to stay at grandparents’ house?
My daughter is 20 months old and me and my wife are planning a trip in December, we will be gone for 7 days at which time my in-laws are going to be watching my daughter. My mother in law has a child care business and watches her every day while me and my wife work and she loves it there has a fit when it’s time to leave. But me and my wife are a little worried that being so young she is going to think that we aren’t coming back for her or something. I’m sure we are not the only ones that have gone through this and I would like so advice and information on how this ended up for others out there. If you have gone through this any advice and stories would be appreciated.
Thanks so much in advance.
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It depends on how close your daughter is to them. I would start with one over night and see how she does. If it makes you feel better see if your inlaws can watch her at your house. Your daughter may be more comfortable that way. They are her grandparents they should be fine.
She will be fine. I had my grandson for week when he was 14 months old. I made mini-videos of an activity he was doing for mom and dad to see every day. A couple times we did skype. The lil one had a great time. and yes, he did have some 'quiet moments' when I knew he was missing mommy and daddy. But for the most part, he had a great time. And I think mom and dad had a harder time than he did!
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He had his familiar blankie, toys, and some other stuff too. We would 'call mommy' during the day before the trip, so he was used to using the phone and video. I'm sure grandma has a few tricks up her sleeve to keep your lil one happy!
This is your mother-in-law??
Remember, she raised your wife at 20 months! Look how THAT turned out!
There is NO reason why the baby SHOULD NOT stay at Grandma's house! My grandchildren spent over-nights with us when they were SIX MONTHS. They NEED the temporary separation in oder to learn how to handle it when they go to school. Grandma has already successfully handled these problems -- and they are mostly myth anyway. So long as your and your wife don't piss and moan, and let the child HEAR you talk about it, she'll be fine.
[Separtion anxiety is most often caused by the worriesd of over-reactive (and sometime over-bearing) parents, and NOT the thoughts of a little one.]
Let grandma spoil her for a while
You could try starting to take overnight trips first and see how that goes. But frankly, you're right, at 20 months she's too young to leave for seven days. At that age, they don't even understand "I'll be back in an hour." I left for nine days at that age, and my niece, not even my daughter, was very angry at me when I came back. Do you really want one of her first memories to be, "Mommy and Daddy abandon me?"
I would not be ready to leave her for so long myself. I know my 20 month old would be traumatized if I left her for so long, even with her grandmother. But, it's your kid.