I met this guy in college, and fell for him, thought he felt the same way. I´m not sure if we were destined to be married but at the time I felt he was the one for me. We live in other countries, and while I was back in my country, another girl came along and stole him. I´m not bitter about it, and I´ve moved on.
At the time I was heartbroken because I felt worthless (my friends helped me through this) and I loved him, and I still do love him a bit, but that love has faded.
However, I was REALLY looking forward to taking his last name. It´s very common in Mexico, where he lives, but Latinos are a minority in USA, where I´m from, so it´s not extremely common. It´s a name I´ve always loved, because I love Spanish last names. Even the common ones like López, Pérez, etc., sound elegant and classy to me.
I love my family with my whole heart, but their last name sucks... I was looking forward to getting married just so I could get rid of it. It´s plain and ugly and I´ve never identified with it.
He was the one who abandoned me, and if we HAD gotten married I would have been able to use his name. I feel like I´m entitled to use his last name because he was the one who ended things and feel like I shouldn´t be cheated out of something that meant a lot to me when I´m not at fault.
This situation sounds extremely unfair and makes me angry: I have gotten into trouble because I asked to be addressed by his last name at school.
I have some Hispanic heritage, and I speak nearly perfect Spanish and I´ve lived in two Hispanic countries... our family surname is extremely all-American sounding. Not putting down America, I just love Hispanic culture more.
There are other women teachers at my school who are married to Latinos, and get to use a Spanish last name. Yet, their Spanish sucks and they don´t have any Hispanic ancestry at all.
It really makes me angry that they can use a Spanish last name and I can´t. I feel that I deserve a Spanish last name more than they do. They´re getting a privilege I don´t get, just because they´re married. To me that´s discrimination.
I say if you get to a certain age and still haven´t gotten married, you should be given the choice of taking a new name.
Update:No, what I´m saying is that even though I love my parents, I hate their last name and couldn´t wait to get married so I could get rid of it... I was looking forward to taking his name and I feel like... why should I be cheated out of something? He did me wrong... I feel like I´m being punished for not being married.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
You can legally change your last name as long as your 18.
However, you are not entitled to his last name because you were NOT married and you were NOT engaged no matter how you felt about him. Just because you think you maybe might have been destined to be married does not give you the right to his last name even though he broke it off. And thats a selfish way of looking at it. Its not your last name nor was it ever yours to take
You can change your last name legally by deed poll to the spanish one.
But you have to separate this in your mind from the relationship. It won't make you more connected with him in any way just by simply having the same last name.
Just legally change it to that last name then.
You can legally change your name (first or last) to whatever the hell you please, providing you're old enough and have the money..
You don't have to just marry.
go for it you can legally change your name
you can legally change your name...but you cannot predent to be married to him..or something