Verified answer

My mom always says "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!"

two things:

1. don't you ever bring home a girl and tell us she is pregnant without a ring on her finger. true story (my mother told me this in high school senior year)

2. my father said: don't wait until your 32 to get married like me.

im now 29 and married lol

My father said: By the inch it's a cinch; by the mile it's a trial!

So true!

Hmm...here's a funny one my mom yelled at me: "You're the reason why parents put their cigarettes out on their children!"

don't masturbate next to the toaster

One thing,

"Don't fuc* up!"

And I never do!!!