Your not alone ppl at a certain age after being through a lot an getting tired there are a lot of talks on YouTube everyone needs something to keep there brain busy with be it religion just try an learn somthing

Please don't give up on yourself!!! You are somebody important and even though it doesn't feel like that right now, it will get better....you just can't give up!! I am speaking from personal experience.....I suffered with severe depression for over 15 years and there were so many times that I would spend all day thinking about ways to get out of life because I felt like I was suffercating, I would spend days crying in my room and didn't wan tt o talk to anyone. People would try to cheer me up or make me laugh but nothing helped. I had my alcoholic drug addict mother who was always stealing from me, verbally abusing me and her elderly father, stealing from him and her mentally disabled sister and I felt that I couldn't love life with a mother I can't trust who is always attacking me verbally. I finally just handed over all of my feelings to the Lord and Prayed every moment that I started to feel overwhelmed without a purpose in life. Eventually, those feelings were passing through my mind less and less each day until one day I noticed that I hadn't had those feelings in a couple of days and realized that Prayers did work. I am just speaking from my experience but also had to believe that I did have a purpose whether I knew what it was and that God has the timeline in place, I wasn't going to learn what that was when I wanted to but only when God intended for me know, so hang in there....I hope that helps a little bit.

Shift focus from self to others. You will find real purpose

There is no need to find yourself you are yourself and can do whatever the hell you want. Just be wise and you'll go in a good direction. Don't chase things bc you feel like you have to. Just be yourself. Though we change as participants in this world we never really change from who we were born as. Trust me. You know yourself your just feeling inadequate or psyching yourself out. You are awsome. All the greats were considered losers at one time all the best saints were the worst sinners. This is how it works

you can consider drinking BLEACH calms mind and gives you the best hallucinations ever.

give a party

better than to insult your mom

Dont give up. Man up and get through it. Nothing was ever meant to be easy.

Typical case of teenage angst.

It will pass mate.