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It can be considered a Gentleman's Disagreement since no bullets were fired and no blood was shed, however Long Hours, Short Pay almost put an end to the Wild West epic, Gunsmoke. Long days of Dry Road to Nowhere negotiations led to frustration and claustrophobia behind the closed doors.

The lead actress and the lead actors were portrayed respectively as The Bad Lady from Brookline and The Noonday Devil by the studio heads. Finally an enterprising

Stranger in Town and fans conducting a Moo Moo Raid on the network put an end to the conflict which could have cleared the Gunsmoke and prevented its monumental twenty year run.

This is not a factual account of any event concerning the tv show. The main actors worked for years on the show and were surprised and disappointed when the show was canceled. This is simply a story created from the episode titles and thoughts of the current writer's strike.

(4) Long Hours, Short Pay. That was pretty much the description of a job at the Long Branch Saloon. In the (6) Wild West, that was pretty much standard for "working girls" but it had all started at the Long Branch.

Things didn't start getting better until the (9) "Bad Lady from Brookline" as she became to be know arrived in town. At first she was just another (9) stranger in town, until she went to work at the Long Branch. She was soon a favorite of the men in the area, especially those who like to partake of (5) "The Noonday Devil" if you know what I mean.

Anyway, it was this woman who first came up with the idea of forming a union for the girls. When she told them about trying to get shorter hours, higher pay, cleaner cowboys, and rooms that didn't give you (10) claustrophobia, they were more than glad to listen.

Ms. Kitty, the owner of the Long Branch at that time, didn't take it lying down (which was quite unusual for Ms. Kitty LOL). One day she caught the Bad Lady from Brookline in the alley behind the Long Branch and warned her saying "Your on a (3) dry road to nowhere, Missy. If I was you, I'd back off this union stuff." This was no (1) gentleman's disagreement and you you could almost hear them hissing at each other from a (7) crooked mile down the road. In fact, Marshall Matt Dillon finally had to come and separate them.

Ms. Kitty sure would have liked to fire her, but she was attracting a ton of business to the Long Branch, especially during the noon hour. After the girls threatened to strike, Ms. Kitty finally gave in to most of the their demands. It turned out OK for her though. Business boomed for many years with cowboys showing up day and night. They were quite pleased to have their trysts in a real "union" establishment.

One hot day a "Bad Lady From Brookline" decided to take her bag and see new things. As she walked the "Dry Road To Nowhere" she thought to herself wouldn't it be wonderful if i was able to drop this bag in a new town, get a job and be able to follow my dream of heading The Center for People With "Claustrophobia" Issues!? Oh what a grand day that would be, she said out loud as she continued walking yet another "Crooked Mile".

She saw up ahead a small town with tumble weeds blowing in the wind much like those she had recalled in the "Wild West" movies she had seen through the window of Old Mr. Johnson's department store in Brookline. As she entered the town she walked past a few men having a "Gentleman's Disagreement" about who they believed to be the mysterious murderer in town, killing thousands of cows in the night. It had been said that the killer would run into the stables screaming "Moo Moo Raid!" just before he would kill the live stock, or at least thats what the local paper had said.

The bad lady continued and noticed a brothel on the corner with a help wanted sign out front. She immediately knew that was her chance at starting out her new career! She walked in and ignored the three women standing in the hallway gossiping to each other about the "Stranger In Town" in which of course she had realized was her. She was able to get the job, it was "Long Hours, Short Pay" and taxing on her body but was going to complete her goal! After all there were many people in this town that would need her help because there were lots of tight places undiscovered due to so many fears!

It wasn't until what the girls at the brothel called "The Noonday Devil" came in one hot afternoon and requested the bad lady in the captains sweet, that her dreams became a reality. For this Devil had money, and had fallen in love with the bag lady. He purchased a home for the two of them and from there she headed her own Claustrophobia unit, of course she wasn't open during the afternoon though as he wanted some gratuity for doing all that he had for her... and lived happily ever after!

(I couldn't help but use all the titles, I was on a role! Thanks I had fun!...)