He's my stepdad's coworker, don't get me wrong, he's not old, he's 25. There are a few problems. For one, I'm only 16. Secondly, I'm not sure how he feels about me. And don't mistake him being in his 20's for him being a fuckboy. He's kind, and gentle, and considerate, and thinks about everyone else in the world before he thinks about himself. I'm in love with him. We get along so well, we finish each other's sentences, we laugh at the same things, we like the same shows and movies. But he's 25, and I'm 16. We're constantly giving each other sex eyes. And he lives at our house right now. When he gets home he says hi to me before he says hello to anyone else. We have movie nights alone together every Saturday night. We have inside jokes. When we're all eating dinner and watching a movie, and he goes to get himself a drink, he gets me one without even asking me. We have a million things in common, but a bunch of things that we don't agree on, which makes all our conversations interesting. And it doesn't help that he's incredibly sexy. He rolls up his shirts so you can see his forearm, he's strong, he has black eyes that I get lost in. He's perfect. But I can't have him because I'm underage, and even if I wasn't, my stepfather would kill us both if anything happened. How can I get over this? Please help me!
Update:Okay, so update, he kissed me.
Answers & Comments
Tell him can we go to some country where our age difference is not a problem :)
"In love" is not love. And it always dies out within 1-3 years of living with them.
NO relationship remains trouble-free, and "in love" is just a fantasy you project onto this person you do not really know well yet.
75% of all common-law relationships break up, and most dating relationships never get to the living-together stage.
50% of all marriages end in divorce and ONLY 12.5% of all marriages make it through the 20-year conflict stage and end up becoming loving companionable partnerships.
You are driving yourself crazy with a self-created fantasy and guaranteed that if you did end up with him, you would see that he is human, has flaws, and you will not always even LIKE him.
At 16, you are afraid of growing up and looking subconsciously for a substitute daddy. You would become claustrophobic by the time you were 30 ... they always do.
You don't know how he feels about you? Yes you do. If he wanted you, he would be chasing after you. Either you do not turn him on, or he just will NOT date you because of your stepfather. Either way, the result is the same. Your fantasy about him makes you suffer and you will continue to suffer until you let go of it.
You are not "in love". You are "in lust". The result of the rapid growth of hormones in a young body. In a while you will get over it for two reasons. One is that you will learn to adapt to your own hormones and TWO is that other boys and men will come along and you will discover that many of them are interesting to you.
Lia. Given that you know all about love and lust and the difference between the two at the ripe old age of sixteen shouldn't you be the one giving advice rather than asking for it? I misunderstood. Given that there are people of sixty who struggle with this I had imagined that someone of sixteen might be possibly a touch immature. Which is why we call them "children" and make them exempt from responsibility in any sexual matters.
Clearly in your case we have it all wrong.
Its ok to have fantasy..as long as you dont go through with them