I don’t know what it is but sometimes my husband just irritates the heck out of me. Sometimes he just drains me because he requires a lot of attention. At night when we go to bed he wants me right next to him and he wants to wrap his entire body around mine. This was a problem for me when we started dating because I literally had to unpry his hands from around my body if I wanted to get up and use the restroom in the middle of the night. I feel as if I can’t breathe when I’m all wrapped under him like this. If I do try to stay on my side of the bed he’ll tug at me constantly until I respond and then he’ll drag me over to his side.
Also, sometimes I run into health issues such as constipation. This past week I was in that situation and ended up getting hemmorhoids. After I finally used the restroom I was kind of sore, but he kept swatting me on my bottom and it was making me so uncomfortable. When we went to bed he was getting ready to rub in that area and I told him no.
Update:I have tried to explain these things to him over and over and over, and he is one of those people that takes offense to everything and never sees anybody else’s point of view. He is a single child that wants what he wants. Trust me, just simply talking to him isn’t going to help. I’ve tried that. He’ll usually respond with “Well I’ll just keep my hands to myself”.
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Um....clingy is never the answer especially in marriage. Affection is one thing, but it almost seems like he is treating you like that blow up doll he talked about. He wants to be able to touch, have sex, and grab when and where it is good for him with no concern for what you want, or how you feel. I would express your concerns directly to him, and if he brings up the blow up doll again, tell him if he can't respect you, to go do what he has to do.
Then tell him to keep his hands to himself. Let him know that you are being sleep deprived because of his actions and if he would let you alone once in a while, you would probably roll over in the middle of the night and surprise him, but that won't happen if he has a bear hug on you every night.
I too like to cuddle, but always roll over and sleep cheek to cheek...so to speak. In the middle of the night sometimes I end up touching my partner...or she ends up touching me...just to make sure the other person is close.
He is using head games on you and he really needs some help. Don't know what you can do about it if he won't talk about it or get professional help. Only you can make that decision.
Prayer and try a family counsel, you can't do it alone. You need his cooperation. Give him the blow-up doll he wants. I don't know if you can accept with this doll around. Maybe he will be satisfied with it while you are having a rest for the next round when he can no longer pull his trigger for a change when he cannot comply with your requirement. You demand.
Lots of information in here...
Well, it seems that he is just very needy and very much in love with you.
Explain to him that you need a bit of space, while reassuring him that you love him.
I'm sure you can find the right words not to hurt his feelings while explaining to him that you sleep much better on your side.
I get your point, but for being quite lovey dovey myself, I understand your husband enjoying to snuggle up to you in bed.
So, don't be too harsh on him.
Good luck.x
Here's your problem right here: "This was a problem for me when we started dating." So it was a problem when you started dating, it was a problem while you were dating, and it was a problem after you got engaged. Somehow, though, you married him anyway. I have a theory that women's #1 marriage error is marrying men expecting them to change. Your husband didn't change, though, so stop acting like you didn't know what you were down for.
I believe that the solution to your "problem" is to start telling yourself, quite correctly I might add, that all the things your husband is doing that you have described add up to this: no big deal. Things are going fine. Nothing is going on that you can't get used to, and the things you don't put up with, just continue not putting up with them -- if he gets his feelings hurt, stop blaming yourself and start accepting the fact that that's his problem. Time to relax and just accept your husband for who he is.
You said he did this before you were married, so why did you marry him?
He sounds like a child and nothing you do is going to change that if talking only makes him pout.
try to explain to him and have an understanding with him about these things the wife and i arent always perfect but it is agreed that things happen when both agree on it even in the bed
You need to explain these things to him just as you have here. Maybe he would be more understanding.
He needs to LISTEN to you and if he doesn t Id have to go Everyone needs space and if you can t be yourself this will never work or YOU will never be happy!
Sounds very self-centered to me....he should be more understanding and compassionate....