A friend of mine was “flattered” to get passed a note from a stranger on the metro the other day that said, in essence, that she was lovely and that he would like to get to know her better, but he was too shy to simply say so to her face.
She posted the note and the story on her Facebook page to get opinions. The guys (like me) just assumed that this was an immature, but probably sincere, approach from a socially awkward guy who doesn’t get out much, and that it probably wouldn’t hurt for her to actually meet him (in a public place, of course).
At least one of her female friends thought that passing notes was “creepy” (her words) and that he probably tried this “line” on every attractive female that he saw.
I thought that her friend was just paranoid, since an experienced “playa” probably would not resort to something as middle-schoolish as passing notes on the bus (or metro) to cute girls.
What would you do? Call him? Or run away screaming “creepy stalker”?
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
The immediate reaction would be fake shock, fake surprise, and thoughts about how they can publicize the message and make a huge publicity event on their favorite Facebook.
What follows next would be solely incumbent on what they they think about the guy: If they find the guy attractive, or if he looks like he was on the train ONLY because there was a major car mashup somewhere which has prevented him from driving home in his Lamborghini, then it's fine. If he isn't, then he'd be called names like "creep", "weirdo", etc.
Yes, that sounds too simplistic, but we've seen and observed the criteria women use to label men "creeps" so many times, this doesn't even have to have a more "complex" explanation.
Sorry but that has 'creepy stalker' written all over it. I live in NY so that would not go over well with me, esp since most of the young guys who approach girls on the subway are just playing around trying to impress their friends. I wouldn't be able to trust that the guy was honest or whatever. IMO, its better if he found a way to talk directly to her when they weren't on the train...that's much less creepy. Even if the guy is socially awkward, taking another approach might make a difference in whether she dates him or not.
I don't know that it would creep me out, but I would have negative feelings about it, and would NOT call him, or think it was cute or complimentary. I'd think the guy was weird, and I don't do weird. I'm not afraid of my own shadow, but at the same time, I have sense enough to keep myself safe. To meet up with a random stranger, even in a public place, is taking a chance on putting yourself in harms way. I'm not willing to take that kind of chance.
I'm a guy and I think that's creepy. Even if she has a pretty face she can still be a psycho. Some guys are so gullible. I would question if she likes you so much why isnt she just coming up and talking to you. There is more going on here than you know.
He's most certainly sincere in his approach. A "playa" would just approach head on as you say.
If this intrigued her and she wants to, I'd tell her to go for it.
I don't see why women think everyone is creepy. It's just a note, relax. Jeez.
I think i'd just be embarrassed, but it is kind of flattering and sweet in that way too, but still wouldn't make me go out with him.
I think it's cute, I wouldn't get involved, but flattered none the less
personally, i would get creeped out!!!! some random man giving you a note saying to meet up??? like a dating website, you can't trust them. if you had seen the before and talk to them, then maybe it would be okish, but start of sitting next to them. it just sounds really odd and confusing ?!!?!?!
Depends on what he looks like and his body language, how he dresses... if he looks like a creepy guy, then yeah, I'd be creeped out.
Flattered but not interested.