My mom said if I finish out the school year (I felt like I couldn’t due to medical issues) I could have anything I want. That’s what I did. My mom says I can one thing that she’ll absolutely say no to because of my good grades. So I decided to ask about dyeing my hair temporarily for the summer a royal blue. I’m not asking for neons. My hair is light to where I wouldn’t really have to worry about bleaching it. She said no. Her reasoning was she has no respect for anyone with dyed hair and she would be absolutely embarrassed if I were to go out in public with an unnatural color. I tried to negotiate,I told her that I would let her pick the amount of hair that was being dyed. She said she wouldn’t even allow a streak. My mom always tries to dominate over everything about me and I’ve asked her about getting a pixie cut and she refuses because she doesn’t like it. See the trend? She never mentioned any concern about chemicals. I’ve offered to pay for it myself. I’ve already pulled the “I want this for myself not because my friends are doing it” card. She says she’d allow blonde highlights but she doesn’t want me to get them anytime soon. It’s really unfair that she won’t allow me to express myself or choose something for myself. It’s not like I’m getting a tattoo! Any tips?
Answers & Comments
So you don't get to do it. wait until you are 18 a legal adult, move out, pay your own rent, and then get to do what you want. until they you obey your mom.
Most un natural hair dyes are temporary, if they're vegan then you shouldn't do much damage to your hair. But some semi permanent dies can stain your hair permanently, which means you may have to bleach it out if you can't wash it out. If you have to bleach your hair (if it's dark brown then you're going to have to lighten it to at least light blond for a blue colour), then you can damage your hair, specially if you try to do it at home and you have no idea what to do. If you're not confident with bleaching your hair then get it done by a professional.
If you can pay for it your self then do it, it's your money and your hair. She might be upset for a while but she'll get over it. You're mother sound judgmental and a bit controlling. You're going to have to stand up for your self if she wants you to get rid of it. But not every one on the planet is like your mother, some people are more accepting of expressing your self. It's your body, she shouldn't be that controlling over it, she's going to have to learn to let you grow up. It's not like her reputation is on the line if you dye your hair blue. It's your body and your hair, she should at least let you try out different thing with it.
Dye your hair anyway to see her reaction.
If your first two statements are correct, your mom should let you dye your hair. How about the "not trusting her" gambit? Why should you trust her the next time she promises something?
Just a tip from someone who's had unnaturally dyed hair for years: if you decide to go through with it, you'll probably have to bleach your hair anyway! At least if you want more of a lasting result.. See, bleach damages your hair. It opens up the hair follicles, which allows the hair dye to get absorbed much more easily... So you actually WANT it to be slightly fried! Just not TOO fried.. (That could also decrease absorption.) This is not the deal with ALL hair dyes. But bright, unnatural ones..? Definitely! As they are ALL semi-permanent wash-out dyes.
Anyway, if you want something that requires even LESS commitment than that..? I know there is hair chalk, and that kind of thing! As well as colors you can put on, that will just leave a coating on your hair, and IMMEDIATELY wash out in the next wash... Perhaps you and your mom could agree on you trying something like that? Just to see if you both liked it? Because, if you didn't..? It would be as simple as having a shower, and then it would ALL be gone!
I don't know how old you are, but your mom sounds very controlling... At least know that, when you move out, you can do WHATEVER you want to do to your hair! And as for now..? Best of luck, and hang on in there! If convincing her doesn't work, and you really want to assert your independence, though..? Have you ever considered doing something like just getting a pixie cut, without even asking her? Because obviously, unlike dying your hair, there's no going back on that! What's she going to do, if she doesn't like it? Force you to GLUE all the hair back on? Or wear a wig, perhaps..? :-P
I don't know about you, but it just sounds like something I might have done, if I had had a mom like that.. Just to show her that: "hey, this is MY hair, and my look, and you don't get to control it!" So.. might be worth considering, perhaps... Unless you think you would get REALLY severely punished for it. :S
Wear neon blue hat instead?
Wrong group.
Why ???