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i was underage in a field and was going home really drunk i had to climb over a huge gate with spikes on top and doing that my jacket got cough and i slipped and was dangling from my jacket with no way down and i peed my self haha untill one of my friends saw me and help me down .

I got drunk last night and I dont remember a thing but my husband says that for about 3 hours I swore that I didn't have a nose and that my lips were dissappering. (My face was numb) I kept saying "I only have half a face", "Do you still love me with no nose", "Does everyone have a half of a face"

He said "Yes, dear everyone has half a face, now you need to go to sleep" and "No, I'm not laughing at you"

I was on a school trip to another city and we had a dance that night, we went out and bought over $150 worth of liquor. We had a bunch of shots then headed out to the dance, where I started falling on top of administrators that were sitting down on the side. I was told that I danced with a very big girl too lol. Ok so we got back to the room and continued to drink a little bit and then I guess we fell asleep. I don't remember any of this, well my roommate told me that I woke up a little bit later, stood up in front of my bed, and dropped off my pants and underwear, got naked, and sat down in a chair in the corner. About a minute passed and she said she heard a little dripping sound on the carpet and it was me peeing on the carpet sitting down naked on that chair lol. In the morning I woke up naked and I was like wtf happened lol.

me and and few of my buddies went campin one time and we were talkin about gettin drunk...and we didnt have any money or alcohol so we decided to wait till everyone went to sleep and take someones cooler. so we went out for about an hour and couldnt find one..so eventually we found a cooler that had about 2 dozen labatts in it and a few sam adams. so we took it to our tent and just slammed them..then we started listenin to some music. and i got up onto a picnic table and started snap dancin to it and fell right off of the table. then my friend started dancin to it too(on the ground) and fell right over...and it was the funniest thing..we were so smashed.

then we woke up the next mornin. and both our girlfriends HATE drinkin so we just didnt drink around them come into our tent and wake us up and the first thing my friends chick finds is a bottle cap from the sam adams. and she asked if we were drinkin..i just lied and said no i was throwin it at my friend and stuff it was so funny.

so then we got up and then i realized i was still messed up...and i had to talk to my friends dad..but luckily he never realized it..such a great weekend.

One time, I tried to climb a fence and fell on my face. Most of the time, I just get relaxed and chill.

evry time my husband gets drunk, he throws out his friends.

it will be like 3 am

and he is wasted and if he about to throw up or just cant stand anymore, he will start throwing people out!

-- more embarrassing than funny

its happened 3 times already and everyone finds it hilarious....

because the way he does it but yeah its horrible...

he starts dancing all crazy and picking up his shirt acting like hes stripping....

he is the life of the party> its one of thse you gotta be there to laugh

I had a situation right out of a sit-com while in the military.

I enter the wrong dark room and crawled into bed with a woman.

I was at the airmans club with some buddies really pounding down some brews. We went to the midnight chow and woofed down some burgers. I was so blitzed but I was feeling good. So we went to the barracks (dorms) to crash for the night. As I tried to get the key in my door it gave me a hassle. My friends are yelling at me, "hey man your at the wrong door." They point me further down the hall. Finally my room.

I turn the knob and walk into the dark room. I did not use the light at of respect of my roommate who (whom?) often goes to bed early. I get undressed and get into bed. A voice. A woman's' voice.

Rob?

Turns out I was in my neighbors room with his gf. It turns out she had come over to surprise him but I ended up surprising her. They were both very cool about it. But the jokes came for a long time.

"Stalker man" "Chester-the-Molester" "Baby snatcher" ouch!

One night after several drinks, I was asleep and the phone rang next to me. My husband woke up to me saying "hello, hello", but the phone kept ringing. This is because I was holding a bottle of hand lotion up to my ear in an attempt to answer it!

I had just started dating this guy and we went out to dinner and went for a walk in this downtown area. He had maybe one beer at dinner and that was it, but I decided to have a few drinks. We went back to my apartment and as we were walking along the sidewalk area to my door, my date looked down at the ground and pointed out to me "oh look, I think that's an owl". I was like "an owl, where? I love owls' " I got down on my knees and started making the "hoo hoo hoo" noises at the owl. My date picked me up and carried me inside. We're married now and he never lets me live down the night I thought I was Dr. Dolittle.

I sang "O Canada" naked and in French back when I was in college once at a party. Sad thing is I don't know "O Canada" in French (and I'm American).