He and I have been dating for a little over 8 months now; we’ve been an official couple for over 4 months. He’s a great guy; caring, funny, very intelligent, a little nerdy (which I think is adorable), loves to cuddle, never gets angry, independent with a stable job, sarcastic as heck just like I am, and is simply all around beautiful to me. So yeah, you get the point—GREAT guy and I like him a lot.
Our relationship has been fantastic, we are both laid back so we never fight, and he’s always completely into me even when we go out with HIS friends! We give each other our space, go out separately etc. I’ve been in several relationships, even been engaged before, and I’ve never enjoyed any relationship the way I’ve enjoyed this one. He makes me smile all the time, and every time I see him I am always so happy to see him again. He always gives me the biggest hug and says, “Hey, how was your day?” He makes me want to be a better person, makes me want to actually take a break from work and just enjoy the day laughing and stupid things and doing absolutely nothing for once. I even like him when he’s drunk, and I’m sober! lol (I don’t drink.)
He is important to me, and I really want this relationship to work. So I don’t push him, and have kind of been letting him steer the relationship where he wants it to go. I didn’t want to put any pressure on him. So I never mention marriage or moving in together etc. I just wanted things to flow as they go (Hoping it flows into something more serious).
Well, this morning he broke up with me, and I do not truly understand why. He said, “Hey, I’ve been thinking, where is this relationship going?...It seems like we’ve been going around in circles…I don’t know, maybe I miss being single and not having to answer to someone. It’s nothing you did, I like you, I care about you...You know, I’ve only dated three people, I just feel like I should date a little more or something. Maybe we could just take a break.”
I do not understand. I know this may sound conceited (truly not meaning to), but I am a great catch. I’m smart, educated, career ambitious, independent, rarely ever get angry, great sense of humor, adventurous, run my own company, pretty, sweet, caring, honest, never get jealous etc. Even his friends and family have said that I’m an amazing catch. They all love me, and hug me, and joke around with me when they see me, ask me for relationship advice etc.
He’s an amazing guy, as I said earlier. I treat him great (do things for him, surprise him with random little gifts, just for the fun of it); he deserves that. I just do not get it, why? Could it be because I’m more experienced relationship-wise? Or because I never really said what I was hoping for? Or what?
When I was leaving…
He said, “I don’t want you to think that this means I do not care about you.”
I responded, “I know.”
He said, “I really do care.”
Me, “I know, I believe you.”
Him, “Can I call you in about a week?”
Me, “Yeah.”
I don’t know; what do you think?
P.S. He is 25, and I am 27.
Answers & Comments
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it's a hard one bacause only the two people in the relationship can really know whats going on and it's hard giving advise because you could just make it worse. the relationship sound's great, could of it been too perfect though you know just too comfortabe and it could of scared him, he said himself he's only been in a few reationships and he felt like he should date more. Maybe he already did feel like you's are married and felt to tied down as he said he missed not having anyone to answer too. and i know you said you's gave eachother freedom but freedom to a guy is different, is'nt it? any slight sense of routine and they get itchy feet it could of been to monotonous for him. he may just need a few day's just a time out to think about what he want's. women do tend to think you're age is perfect for staring something serious and settling down with kids ect; but men are big kids he could just feel he's to young for this.
If the guy wants his freedom, let him have it, but let him know that he can date other girls just like you can date other guys. He might find someone out there he feels a connection with and you might, too. If he wants to open that door, he must accept the risks, too. I would advise him that you aren't going to be sitting at home pining over him. You will also be getting "in circulation". The risk is that you both will find other mates and that's a possibility. Tell him that you accept him breaking up with you since he doesn't want to be in a committed relationship with you at this time. Tell him that you are sure that he fully understand the risk that he is taking and then tell him to have a good life.
Yeah, it sucks. Recently, a similar thing happened to me. The girl left me and it sounds exactly like what you said: No fights ever, we clicked so well, and we were perfect for each other. And she said almost the same thing: I didn't do anything bad, I was perfect, etc.
There's not much to say, I guess. I'm still trying to make sense of it. Apparently, people just sometimes stop loving you for no reason. Not exactly comforting.
It sounds to me like he doesnt want to commit to anything. Guys have trouble staying with one girl. I'm its nothing youdid personally. But,he might just want to get away from a relationship and do stuff. Like..you know. I was just in a reltionship and i really liked her. But i just kinda felt smotherd, so we broke up. Just try to give him a little space and keep talking to him and i'm sure when he feels like hes ready to calm down and commit..he will ask you back out. Good luck!
I wish I knew, your situation sounds a lot like something that happened to me (A LOT) but I can tell you make sure you do everything in your power to get him back & show him that your the girl for him because if you don't another girl will & you'll always regret it.
If you want to keep a guy, then you should pressure him to have sex with you. Because he will like you more this way.
You've left the relationship up to him. And he was probably too shy to initiate with you the kind of affection he wanted. And that's why he gave up on you.
I see. i think his friends convinced him that your not the girl and you should get a better 1?
he wants to explore his life
love is confusing answer mine
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