My stepson (13yrs) will be living with us for the next 2 yrs. We have 3 more kids (8,4 & 2). He usually visit us during summer & X-Mas vacations. My in-laws every time he visits they want to give him lots of present, our kids only get presents on B*Day & X-Mas. Now that school is about to start they bought him 3 pairs of jeans, 4 uniform shirts,2 pair of shoes, backpack, 2 games for the PSP & 1 for the DS, plus $40.00 & they took him on vacations for almost 3 weeks. Now his mom thinks we can’t afford to buy him things but he has new clothes , shoes , underclothes, 5 uniform polo shirts for school that we bought for our home because his mom didn’t let him bring any of his clothes . My hubby works away from home and because of his job we couldn’t go out on vacations so we planned to go during Labor day weekend, and the next during Thanksgiving. We bought our 4 kids clothes, shoes, school supplies, backpacks and a game for their DS. My hubby doesn’t what is going on, because our 2 oldest kids are asking why he gets more than us?
My in-laws haven’t buy our kids nothing, not even a pencil for school, not because they need anything, they know we will buy them what we can, when we can. But my in-laws seem not to understand and they are buying more and more. I don’t want to break the “good” relationship I have with my in-laws, but I don’t like what they are doing, I think they should be a little even because they have 6 grand-kids in total and only my step-son gets more & when he wants. My hubby will be coming home in 2 weeks and will have a serious talk w/ my in-laws, because he doesn’t agree with all this. What will be best to do? Besides talking to them and w/ my step-son about all this. Any advices please!
Answers & Comments
I absolutely see where u are coming from. I was at one time in a similar situation. It is not a good one to be in. I spoke to my mom in law about it and of course she got upset with me and i hated that but i have to stand up for all the kids. If i don't who will. i told her i did not have a problem with her buying but if she was gonna do that buy for all the kids or none of them. It was sad to go through but i felt lf i did not do something it would cause trouble between the kids because as u said the kids do notice and will start asking and the next thing u know they don't like each other because of different treatment among them. U cannot let that happen. Home will be hell for you and the kids if it does. your in laws are adults they should understand this and if not oh well it is the kids u have to think about.
Good luck to you.
my parents have always bought everything my nephews needed for school and nothing for my kids. When I asked them about it, they said because my sister never puts her kids first so they(my parents) needed to. But I have always taken care of my kids and didn't need their help.
Well, as unfair as it is.......it's life. People always seem to get rewarded for bad behavior while those of us who do their best get left behind. But that's OK. Your kids will always know YOU took care of them. Your step son will never know that feeling of his parents.
well it's good that you are going to talk about it all together, maybe you should bring up the fact that your kids are starting to notice that he is getting more and wondering why they don't. i mean it is unfair since he is like one of your own now, i mean you are his stepmom.
no where in this babbling could i find any form of a question. my answer: give your stepson a cold water enema.