I’m writing this because I honestly don’t know how I should tell her. We’re in our senior year of college and we’re set to graduate together this may. We’ve been together for over two years and we’ve been talking about everything we’re going to do after we graduate and we’ve made plans on things to boot. Over the summer I’ve meet a few doctors that are regulars at the bar I work at and have been talking to them about what they do. Before this I felt like I had my mind set on what I wanted to do, but now I don’t feel the same. I know in my heart that I want to be a doctor and make a difference in what I do. The more I think about it the more I know it’s what to do. What makes me scared to think about telling my girlfriend is that it’s going to take me a lot more time to finish school. I’ll need to complete my premed prerequisites and possibly a post-bacc, and that’s just to get into a medical school. I know that I’m going to have to devout myself more than I ever have to anything else before and that things are only going to get harder from here. How should I tell her? I know I’m asking her to put her life on hold for me so there’s no easy way to do it, but what is the best way.
Update:Seriously, what’s with all the hostility ****? I’m coming to you all with a real problem!
Answers & Comments
Don't ask her to put her life on hold. Just tell her that your plans for your future have changed and that they don't include getting married anytime in the near future because you have decided to focus on getting your medical degree. You two made plans. Those plans are going to change. You have decided to do something else.
Do NOT ask her to put her life on hold. You two are still quite young yet. Perhaps this is too soon in life to have decided that you've found a life partner. If you are absolutely certain she's the one (I don't think you are), lives needn't be put on hold anyway. But my suggestion is that you do NOT ask her to put her life on hold in any manner. Your decision is changing YOUR life.
I've decided that being a doctor is more important to me than you are so if you want to wait until I make a doctor marriage with you will just have to wait as I will have to do a lot of studying and that crazy work schedule so I probably won't have much time for sex, maybe a quickie with a female student or nurse now and then.
"What would you think about having a doctor in the family?" "Would your mom like it?" "Bet she would." "How would you feel about being put in second place for a few years?" How drunk were the doctors at the bar getting?