I have a roomate who has been living with me for 2 years approximately. Since the whole Pandemic began, he's been collecting unemployment since April or May. I on the other hand have a full time job & been busting my a** while he sits & sleeps at home, smokes weed and plays video games all day. (Sometimes he goes to the gym or spends time out of the house once in a while) He doesn’t clean or do dishes & when he runs low on $$ his Mom always helps him with something. (Don't get me started on his pigsty of a bedroom...How he manages to occasionally still bring over girls is beyond me.) My paychecks don't come out to as much as he makes off those $1300 unemployment checks he gets every 2 weeks. Granted, he's technically not on the lease but my landlord is aware he's living here. (Who's also getting tired of him cause he always makes late payments.) How can I get him to stop being a lazy piece of crap & get off his *** to work? Should I make him pay for the majority of the light bill since hes always here every night? I don't know what I'm more sick & tired of: The fact that he's as lazy as a kid in summertime or the fact he's not remotely attempting to look for a job. Any tips or advice?
Answers & Comments
As long as you are willing to give he will be willing to take. Tell him things are going to have to change and if he isn't willing to do what you want him to then tell him the door is over there, you need to get out.
Your quote, "My paychecks don't come out to as much as he makes off those $1300 unemployment checks he gets every 2 weeks." tells it all.
I presume you live in the USA (I don't). Your country's minimum wage of $7.25/hour is ridiculous, and your house mate is acting rationally by not working. You should go to your boss and say you are going to resign so that you can get more money by collecting unemployment, like your house mate does.
It's great to have a work ethic, but it's silly to have a work ethic when working means you get LESS money than by not working. Maybe your house mate will work if it is a job where he earns significantly more than he is getting in unemployment. But if you can't find such a job yourself, how would you find a high-paying job for him?
Next time he is output on a mask and gloves pack his stuff and leave it by the door, time for the clean up or get out chat
You cannot change him. We cannot change anyone except ourselves and even that is hard.
Since he is not your husband, you don't have enough involvement in his life TO object to whether or not he is lazy or not looking for work.
YOU have to learn how to work with YOUR emotional reactions. It's not like he's physically beating you up, after all.
Generally, roommates split the bills 50/50 unless both agree otherwise. Don't expect him to agree. And just HOW are you going to "make" him pay more than his share of the electricity bill?If you are tired of living with him, tell him to move out. He is NOT on the lease, so he has no rights to stay there, even though the landlord knows he is living there. You can probably get the landlord to hand him an eviction notice ... and the Sheriff will come and physically remove him if he is NOT out by the end of the 2 week period. But expect it to be an awful 2 weeks ... people who are given eviction notice can break things, steal things, make your life h*ll.
You can’t. You can move out though. That’s what you can control.